I often forget I had a life before my autoimmune system went Pete Tong. I used to be very active, I was one of those very annoying 200 mile and hour people who never sat still, always had something new to do, I didn't understand the lure of a holiday, I always wondered what I would do after the all you can eat breakfast. I got as far as read a book, then what? Relax, hmm I hadn't mastered relaxing in 50 years, bit late to start now. I imagined myself staying in full time work until I could no longer do the job, I aimed for someplace in my mid 70's. Retiring was never an option. I loved my job, I had worked damned hard to become a Team Manager Social Work and I got such satisfaction from knowing I had helped to change a life, to help someone. Coming home each day feeling I had done the best I could gave me such joy. I went to the gym for 2 hours most nights, I loved going out with friends, I loved to party and dance, I so loved to dance, I might not be any good at it, but